Currently Playing
Aaron Cole
Right On Time (Feat. Tobymac)
Jeremy Camp Christ In Me
Matt Redman 10,000 Reasons (Bless The Lord)
Big Daddy Weave Jesus I Believe
Johnny Diaz Breathe
Ryan Stevenson Eye Of The Storm
Mandisa He Is With You
Sanctus Real Lay It Down
Meredith Andrews Spirit Of The Living God
Britt Nicole Walk On Water
Zach Williams Fear Is A Liar
Danny Gokey The Comeback
Cory Asbury Reckless Love
Unspoken Miracle
Newsboys God's Not Dead (Like A Lion)
Big Daddy Weave Redeemed
Finding Favour Cast My Cares
Matt Maher All The People Said Amen
Tauren Wells When We Pray
Hawk Nelson Words
Building 429 Where I Belong
+

Chuck Norris' Birthday

ADVERTISEMENT

today is Chuck Norris' 70th birthday. he's not really 70 years old, people just haven't figured out yet to count his age in Chuck years instead of normal human years. here are some Chuck Norris facts though that THE Chuck Norris picked out as some of his favorites:

  • When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
  • There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
  • Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
  • Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
  • Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
  • Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
  • There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
  • When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
  • Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
  • Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
  • Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
  • Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
  • Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
  • Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
  • Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.


Comments powered by Disqus
Page Loading